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4 Fortunately Dead Horror Movies

PoppaScotch 4 Comments

Making feature films is a long and expensive process filled with coins all over the tracks that can permanently derail an entire project.  Most of the time the circumstances surrounding a failed project boil down to money related issues like for example, sometimes the star of the film has to drop out which causing all of the funding to magically disappear.

Its unfortunate that many times the proposed budget is simply too large for the investment and the movie never even gets past the planning stages and we the viewers miss out on a project that may or may not have ended up being an amazing horror film.  These four films however all have reached the development hell stage of production and as of right now are all considered “dead”.  I for one am actually pretty happy about that.

Oh yeah, and they are all remakes of sequels…. Fancy that…

Battle Royale What was originally planned at the American version of the 2000 Japanese exploitation-esque film about a class of Japanese students, who are forced in to a battle to the death on a remote island, was briefly considered to be remade.  The film is shocking, insane, and to put it nicely: really outside the box.  It’s a product of its time (as was the original novel) showing a disconnection between the youth culture and the adult culture.  It’s a brilliant movie that took the metaphor all the way to the extreme in a new and provoking way that forces you into seeing the underlying themes and it’s a textbook example of catching lightening in a bottle.  The American remake was originally announced back in 2006 and immediately came to a halt after the 2007 shootings at Virginia Tech University.

The idea is that Americans wouldn’t like the extreme nature of the film and it was even speculated that the teenagers would be from a detention system in what I suppose is a misguided way to try and justify the children on children violence.  Considering that was the entire point of the film, it seems like the death of the project was a blessing considering whoever was in charge of the Americanization of the film completely missed the point.  It was last reported that New Line Cinema owns the rights, so who knows where they reside now.  It’s not saying that the project will never happen, just will most likely never happen.

4 Fortunately Dead Horror Movies

Candyman 4 I am a huge fan of the first Candyman film.  It’s an absolutely perfect example of how Urban Horror should be handled where the physical haunted house is replaced by a state of mental isolation.  It’s been quite some time since I’ve seen both of the sequels to Candyman but I do remember them seeming extremely forced while abandoning everything that made the first film great.

That being said, talks about Candyman 4 surfaced back in 2004 but it appears that the boat sailed on a purposed budget of 25 million (who really thought that was going to happen?).  The project then took a very interesting (horrible) turn.  After the success of Freddy vs. Jason, the idea came that since Candyman is a Clive Barker character and so is Pinhead from Hellraiser, and then they should have their own vs. movie.  Whoever thought that was a good idea should be taken out back behind the barn and beatin’ till some sense comes into them.  I’m sureeveryone is are glad that they didn’t get a chance to ruin Candyman while somehow simultaneously making Hellraiser have less credibility than it already has.

4 Fortunately Dead Horror Movies

Friday The 13th Part II If we are going by the strictest definition of the term, the sequel to the absolutely terrible rebranding of Jason Voorhees’s seminal slasher film Friday the 13th isn’t “dead”, it’s “on hold”.  By “on hold” it means that someone has an idea and there is actually a script out there, but no one is moving forward with it.  This is probably all for the best considering that this attempt was a shining example of how an original film with very little substance can be completely reimagined as a film with even less substance.

Remember when the Friday the 13th movies started getting bad?  It was when the writers and directors decided to just completely dismiss any kind of characters whatsoever that aren’t named Jason and the movies became all about the fantastic kills displayed on interchangeable and worthless characters.   Was it fun?  Hell yeah it was fun, even if the movies themselves weren’t good, a good time was had by all so how bout we don’t taint that image with something horrible.

4 Fortunately Dead Horror Movies

Rosemary’s Baby Platinum Dunes originally planned to do this remake back in 2007, but they have since abandoned the idea, hopefully because they realized that they aren’t complete morons.  Seriously, remaking this film would be a worse idea than eating food that was prepared and served by monkeys (because they play with a lot of poop, you get the joke).  Roman Polanski’s film is not only beautifully shot, but expertly acted and written with a tight script that really makes the viewer think for the entire running time that maybe, just maybe Rosemary may be losing her mind.  Turns out of course that she isn’t and her surprising and terrifying journey through the miracle of child birth quickly goes from bad to worse.

It’s a metaphor that plays on every parents fear that not only may they be slipping away mentally, but their helpless child may also be in harm’s way.  The stakes have never been higher and in a horror film, it can’t possibly get any more engrossing than that.  That however is the whole point, that the baby is actually the spawn of Satan and even though the absolute worst case scenario happened, there is still life to be lived.  Could you imagine an audience now seeing a remake?  We all know what is going to happen and if that ending didn’t unravel in the film, then what on earth couldn’t another ending be?  Would the baby come out normal and have Rosemary end up in a mental institution?  Would the baby kill Rosemary?  Would Rosemary eat the baby?  There is no way that you could satiate an audience that enjoyed this film, and it looks like for once, Hollywood actually realized that before the fans carpet bombed the theater…. with constant bitching.

4 Fortunately Dead Horror Movies

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4 Comments

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      1. Skidog April 6, 2011 at 2:06 pm

        Nice article! I agree with most everything here, though I can’t comment on the Battle Royal movie. I wouldn’t mind a Rosemary’s Baby remake if they brought in the top people to make it. It would need to be an increadible movie to live up to the name. I don’t need any more Jason or Candyman movies. I can go watch the ones already out there any time I need to.

      2. Riley April 6, 2011 at 2:34 pm

        I think if they did Rosemary’s Baby with a different take on it, it could be a good remake. But again, I don’t really think it’s that great of a movie to begin with.

        Same goes with Friday the 13th part II. I actually have an idea that I think would make for a great sequel mainly changing the setting from summer time at Crystal Lake to winter time. That’s never been done before and totally should.

      3. Aidan13 April 8, 2011 at 1:22 am

        I’m still waiting for a Battle royal 3

      4. Anonymous November 17, 2011 at 5:00 pm

        I was just watching this on http://watchitonline.ch/ ! It’s really cool, my recommendation :)