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50 Horror Movie Survival Tips

BlondeRobynGirl 11 Comments

50 Horror Movie Survival Tips

I love watching horror movies, and I’ve always thought about things that I would or wouldn’t do if I were in a horror movie myself. I always feel like I am yelling at characters in movies for the stupid things they are doing, so I wanted to create a list of 50 tips to survive a horror movie. If the characters in horror films had this list, I believe it could save their life. There are many other tips we could all come up with to survive a horror film, but here are my 50 survival tips:

  • Don’t read aloud from books.
  • Don’t go anywhere alone- you’re much safer in a group.
  • Make sure there is always someone who runs slower than you, so that you won’t be the one getting killed!
  • Always tie your shoes. You might need to get away fast and you don’t want to trip!
  • Never look back to see where the monster/ killer is. Chances are he’s behind you so keep running!
  • Always keep a weapon with you. Preferably something that will not break, run out of bullets or need electricity.
  • Never investigate the strange noise. Just get out of there!
  • Never go wandering in the woods.
  • Never go wandering in dark attics or basements.
  • Make sure your cellphone is fully charged and with you at all times, in case you need to call 911!
  • Don’t drink. You can’t run very fast when you’re drunk.
  • Don’t do drugs. You probably won’t see the killer when you’re stoned, until it’s too late.
  • Don’t have sex. We all know that the virgin is usually the one who lives.
  • Stay away from small, deserted towns. They’re probably deserted for a reason.
  • Don’t open closed doors, especially if you hear moaning, scratching, loud breathing, or any other odd noise.
  • Don’t look behind the shower curtain. Chances are that the killer will be standing behind you when you do.
  • Keep your doors and windows locked! Do not open them for any reason unless you need to escape.
  • Know your surroundings. If the power goes out, you need to know how to escape from the area in the dark.
  • Don’t bathe, especially if you’re alone in the house/ apartment/ hotel room.
  • Don’t go near cemeteries, funeral homes, or any other places where dead things are.
  • Never bother or play with dead things- they might not actually be dead!
  • If your electronics or appliances start acting strange, i.e. turning on/ off on their own, making weird sounds, etc., leave immediately.
  • Don’t be a smart ass; it will only get you killed.
  • Beware of animals acting strange or that are following you around.
  • Don’t babysit. Being a babysitter never results in anything good.
  • If your car runs out of gas, don’t go to an abandoned gas station to find help. Call someone for help with your charged cellphone!
  • Don’t go to summer camp, or do any camping in general.
  • Don’t go to places such as Haddonfield, Crystal Lake, Elm Street, Amityville, Bates Motel, Woodsboro, or any other area you have heard of from horror movies.
  • Don’t play with or go near dolls. They may be possessed and try to kill you.
  • Don’t run upstairs! Run out the front door!
  • Watch where you’re going when you walk or run somewhere.
  • Don’t hide somewhere where there’s only one way to get in or out.
  • If you get away from the killer, don’t go back. If your friend/ family member is back there, call the police!
  • If your friend is well versed in horror movies, listen to what they tell you! They might help you survive!
  • Don’t invite strangers into your house.
  • When you get the chance to kill the killer, do it! Don’t shoot him in the arm or hit him once with your shovel, make sure you get the job done i.e. shoot him in the forehead, bash his face in until nothing is left, chop his head off, etc.
  • Be quiet, you don’t want the killer to hear you and know where you are!
  • Don’t fall asleep.
  • If someone calls you and asks you what your favourite scary movie is, don’t tell them. Hang up the damn phone and run!
  • Don’t wear glasses. Get contacts because you don’t want your glasses to fall off.
  • Don’t watch videos that may be cursed. If you do, you probably won’t be here a week from now.
  • Don’t go into haunted houses.
  • Don’t go into Michael Myers’ house to investigate.
  • Have a dog with you. They can see/ hear the killer when you can’t.
  • Don’t wear high heels; they’re hard to run in.
  • Don’t ask “Who’s there?” when you hear a strange noise. Just run!
  • If it’s Halloween, don’t go out trick or treating or go to a party. Lock all your doors and windows and have a weapon in your hand.
  • If you see a man standing beside your clothes line and then he suddenly disappears, make sure your house is all locked up and call the police, a swat team and whatever else your area has available. Chances are you’re going to need it!
  • Watch out for zombies, mummies, vampires, people wearing masks, people with any sort of weapon, people who look crazy, hitchhikers, old people, children, or anyone who makes you feel uneasy.
  • And, my last tip: Never say “I’ll be right back”, because chances are you won’t be!

What would be your tips to someone trying to survive a horror movie?

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11 Comments

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      1. Bill March 1, 2013 at 1:02 am

        1. Never leavre any sort of masks around the house. they seem to get worn by killers
        2. Always keep a boat running so you can take off when being chased near a body of water
        3. Fire retardent clothing is a fashion requirement
        4. Try and keep an extra set of keys in your pocket in case you drop yours when running away from a killer
        5. When having sex, be on the bottom as you will be able to see up if someone enters the room…

      2. Alex B. June 9, 2013 at 4:32 pm

        ”And, my last tip: Never say “I’ll be right back”, because chances are you won’t be! ”
        haha Scream tips ! Great tips!

      3. K Hutch (@72nivek) June 10, 2013 at 4:13 am

        Dont be the token black guy’…

        • Donald Morgan August 12, 2013 at 9:44 am

          If you are the ‘black guy’ make sure you are a rapper cause those are the only black guys to survive in horror movies…

          1. Ice Cube in Anaconda
          2. Busta Rhymes in Halloween 8
          3. LL Cool J in Halloween H2O & Deep Blue Sea

      4. kXnPunk June 10, 2013 at 10:58 am

        We have a thread kinda like this on the forum and it’s freaking HILARIOUS!!! :D
        http://www.horror-movies.ca/Forum/viewtopic.php?id=30573

        Very nice tips BTW, thanks.

      5. Mike New June 11, 2013 at 7:56 am

        Nice! Sounds like we don’t have many options. LOL

      6. krystal12345 June 14, 2013 at 10:32 pm

        I have a few.

        *Do not go in attics or basements. Just avoid them like the plague.

        *Don’t you even think about running upstairs from a psychopath!

        *When using a gun, shoot half the clip. Don’t just shoot once and hope you hit the vital spot.

      7. L. A. Howard August 23, 2013 at 9:46 pm

        - Don’t go to small towns that are only populated by children.
        – If your child tells you that the new nanny/adopted kid/etc. is evil…LISTEN TO THEM!
        – If your kid is playing with someone you can’t see, grab your kid and go to a hotel. Do NOT return to the house FOR ANY REASON!
        – Don’t watch the static on TVs, computer screens, etc.
        – Don’t tempt fate.

      8. TheCat January 2, 2014 at 10:46 pm

        One tip:
        Never ask, “Anybody there?” It’s not like the serial killer will be like, “Yeah I’m in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?”