Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Vamp_Slayer wrote:

BTK this was an excellent thread idea.

Thank you Vamp smile I just saw a lot of imagination in everyone on HM.CA, if we can share something and learn a little then it all makes us closer and more open. But thank you for the compliment big_smile

And Wolfy, self indulgent? In my opinion, No. Everyone will lose someone they love unfortunate is life. If writing helps to heal someone then that can only be a good thing. I've written many stories stemmed from family and those I have lost and I am stronger for it.

You're poem was beautiful like I said prior and just lovely to read. Nothing wrong with expressing yourself. That's why I love ya all on HM.CA smile x

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

The stuff I write some would consider poetry but to me they are just random thought placed in a somewhat discernible order. I believe this is self-explanatory as to what the subject is.

Changes

I see changes and never knew. I trust and fell apart again. I cannot change the fact that I’m alone. I would not change it. Trust her with my love, never. Lies told, souls sold. This is her life. She can never stop. Depression, rejection, deceit, fury. This is my life. I need to leave so I can breathe. Screaming matches rip open bleeding wounds. Fighting breeds hatred. Hatred breeds rage. Rage overcomes.
She betrayed me. She blamed me. She condemned me. She hates me for what she has done. I control my anger though my soul burns. She disgusts me. Her face brings emotions I swore never to feel again. Emotions that never die. They just lay, waiting to emerge from the ashes of a past life. I see through her. I see her malice, her pure selfishness. When this is over I will thank her. Simply for showing me how naive I once was. Reminding me of the cruelty one person is capable of.
How can I be complete if I’m hollow? I must expand my life, for this I give my sacrifice. I must travel this path alone as I have done before. I believed in her, had faith in her, TRUSTED her, loved her, always there for her, cannot escape her. I will not fall victim to the inferno burning inside. My strengths have been tested, I wear the scars that prove. What will see me through? She once said she loved me with all her heart, “always and forever† right? When did that die? How I believed truth was in her eyes.
Nights filled with loneliness. I woke in chains, these shackles tear my flesh and blood that flows from these wounds, black as night. Your lies consume me. Her words ring within my ears and chill my spine. As rage builds control is waning. The shell of restraint is crumbling. No way but up from here. Fill the time, fill the holes, regain control. I pray I’ll not stumble again.
She doesn’t know what it’s like to be dead inside. She called him a friend to help get her through it. I see her true face now. Late night comes and all alone. She’s out with urge to satisfy with no remorse. I never wanted this. Gave myself to be repaid with lies. Amazing how she calls and feigns innocence. She drowns me in her wake, with no devotion. When I trust her I lose. A slave to my thoughts daily. Can she feel my heart fade away?
I doubted myself to trust in her. The ultimate betrayal.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

WOW. Bottletweaks.... thats good stuff... i could make that onto a song

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

bottledtweaks feels the burn, damn bro

let's lighten the mood with a feel good song/poem (whatever) I wrote back in '06

See the flames begin to rise
reflecting in your blackened eyes
all around is pure turmoil
as bodies fall upon the soil
no parting of the seven seas
swim in blood up to your knees
no saviors for our dying race
it's the final fall from grace

  death hand it's iron fist
  scratches you from the list
  what you know is all but gone
  won't live to see another dawn

angels weep for souls forgot
blessed be or so they thought
awakened by their cruel deception
searching for their life's redemption
ghostly hordes rape the land
our pillars crumble into sand
hell on earth, a funeral pyre
where all shall perish in the fire

  death hand it's iron fist
  scratches you from the list
  what you know is all but gone
  won't live to see another dawn

revelation of the damned
it's the slaughter of the lamb
what you thought was paradise
was only in a book of lies


(I'm in negotiations with Bono as we speak)

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Yes I did write this...It drank its Tang and belched a blister
                                    bared its fang and ate my sister.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

It drank its Tang and belched a blister

Tang and blisters - yikes! LOL

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Good times Deadhorse....Good times wink

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

bottledtweaks wrote:

The stuff I write some would consider poetry but to me they are just random thought placed in a somewhat discernible order. I believe this is self-explanatory as to what the subject is.

Changes

I see changes and never knew. I trust and fell apart again. I cannot change the fact that I’m alone. I would not change it. Trust her with my love, never. Lies told, souls sold. This is her life. She can never stop. Depression, rejection, deceit, fury. This is my life. I need to leave so I can breathe. Screaming matches rip open bleeding wounds. Fighting breeds hatred. Hatred breeds rage. Rage overcomes.
She betrayed me. She blamed me. She condemned me. She hates me for what she has done. I control my anger though my soul burns. She disgusts me. Her face brings emotions I swore never to feel again. Emotions that never die. They just lay, waiting to emerge from the ashes of a past life. I see through her. I see her malice, her pure selfishness. When this is over I will thank her. Simply for showing me how naive I once was. Reminding me of the cruelty one person is capable of.
How can I be complete if I’m hollow? I must expand my life, for this I give my sacrifice. I must travel this path alone as I have done before. I believed in her, had faith in her, TRUSTED her, loved her, always there for her, cannot escape her. I will not fall victim to the inferno burning inside. My strengths have been tested, I wear the scars that prove. What will see me through? She once said she loved me with all her heart, “always and forever��  right? When did that die? How I believed truth was in her eyes.
Nights filled with loneliness. I woke in chains, these shackles tear my flesh and blood that flows from these wounds, black as night. Your lies consume me. Her words ring within my ears and chill my spine. As rage builds control is waning. The shell of restraint is crumbling. No way but up from here. Fill the time, fill the holes, regain control. I pray I’ll not stumble again.
She doesn’t know what it’s like to be dead inside. She called him a friend to help get her through it. I see her true face now. Late night comes and all alone. She’s out with urge to satisfy with no remorse. I never wanted this. Gave myself to be repaid with lies. Amazing how she calls and feigns innocence. She drowns me in her wake, with no devotion. When I trust her I lose. A slave to my thoughts daily. Can she feel my heart fade away?
I doubted myself to trust in her. The ultimate betrayal.

Holy Crap, dude, I wish you formatted that better so it was easier to read, but that was very angry and deep and dark.  That girl really fucked you over

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

ok it's self indulgence time , i 'm losing a dear friend and work colleague at the end of the week and this is something i wrote from the heart this morning , probably won't mean much to you guys and i'll never show her but i wanted to put it down:|

                               Empty Inside

There are days, bad old days when my heart doesn't want to know
And my brain it is dead to avoid showing feelings i daren't show
And my heart wants to scream in frustration and despair
cos i know that from now,you'll no longer be there
I'm left all empty inside
That's the best i can say, can't explain feeling this way
My feelings for you, there's nothing i can do
i'm sorry if it gives you worry, for that i'm truly sorry
I wish you the best, you know i do
That's the truth, and whether or not you ever think of me, i'll always think of you
I'm empty inside
You made me laugh, you made me smile
You gave me confidence for a while
But in my heart, i knew this day would come
i'm happy for you i truly am, you're a wonderful girl and you have a wonderful man
You deserve the best in life, but i can't help being empty inside
I lose a friend today, you say it's not so
But deep down i know, i would do the same if i were you, better off without that old fool
I wish you all the best, i truly do
You will forget me , but i'll never forget you
I love you like a sister, even though i'm empty inside.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Wolfy...

No1, do not be silly darlin'. The purpose of this thread is to be open, imaginative and yourself. It means a lot that you are willing to share something that is dear to you, to us on here and that in itself says a lot for you hun and why we love you so wink

2. Feel free to disagree all you want, but there is a true artist in you. That was both heartbreaking but beautiful to read, you do have a gift for writing and it showed. That was stunning smile

***Hugs**, here if you ever need a friend Wolfy hun smile

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

I've never wrote a poem before, but I've wrote songs. They're kind of simular aren't they?

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

BlackTequilaKiss wrote:

Wolfy...

No1, do not be silly darlin'. The purpose of this thread is to be open, imaginative and yourself. It means a lot that you are willing to share something that is dear to you, to us on here and that in itself says a lot for you hun and why we love you so wink

2. Feel free to disagree all you want, but there is a true artist in you. That was both heartbreaking but beautiful to read, you do have a gift for writing and it showed. That was stunning smile

***Hugs**, here if you ever need a friend Wolfy hun smile

Thanks for your kind comments BTK,you are the best. i am a little proud of this one, now and again i get a feeling and i'm able to write from the heart and not think about it ,it just comes out and this little thing came out in a matter of minutes,and when i read it i thought it was like a song even though i say it myself.i find writing things down and putting it in a sort of poem/statement helps with my feelings. thanks for the offer and the same goes to you, even though you have others, i am also here if you need someone to listen. bless you, luv ya xx:)

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

The Creature wrote:

I've never wrote a poem before, but I've wrote songs. They're kind of simular aren't they?

i would say so creature smile

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

<<< wipes the tears away >>>>> wolfie that poem is sooooooooooooooo sweet and straight from the heart of a true gentleman . loves ya wolfie I'm always here for you sweetie xxxx

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Thanks Puppy darling, you're another beautiful person on here, love you to bits as well! thanks love, i know you're there, and the same goes to you, if you need a friend or someone just to listen i'm here xxx:)

Last edited by wolfman1959 (2009-09-07 14:20:07)

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

with trembling temerity I grope about
the pounding of my heart beats hard
against the iron bands wrapping my chest
smothering, I get no air
which way?
I'm lost

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

^^ I actually really liked that smile

The sense of imprisonment, being confined. Not knowing where you are or where you're going, there def. is a true sense of fear in that.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

All good stuff.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

When the sun sets
and the wind roars
I hear my name called
the knock chants at the doors
a sound that beckons me awake
an icy grip that I must take...to travel down that dusty road
I swing behind onto the leather seat, He kicks it over, flames fly from the exhaust
It roars so loud
He turns to me, Grinning beneath His dark shroud
I point my face to the wind
waiting for my final ride to begin
I hear a song, sung by an unknown chorus
(in the distance, far away)
where I've heard it before I can not say
the dirge that rhymes rings strong and true
Its for me and Its for you.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Haiku

Winter rust colors
falling whispering subjects
awash the cold sleeping ground

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

thedeadshallrule wrote:

When the sun sets
and the wind roars
I hear my name called
the knock chants at the doors
a sound that beckons me awake
an icy grip that I must take...to travel down that dusty road
I swing behind onto the leather seat, He kicks it over, flames fly from the exhaust
It roars so loud
He turns to me, Grinning beneath His dark shroud
I point my face to the wind
waiting for my final ride to begin
I hear a song, sung by an unknown chorus
(in the distance, far away)
where I've heard it before I can not say
the dirge that rhymes rings strong and true
Its for me and Its for you.

i like this Daph, very good and ends with a chill. ( hugs)x

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Oh! Oh! Poems! big_smile cool
I remember doing haikus in school. I should still have one of mine around here somewhere. I always enjoyed doing them. I like yours, deadshallrule. Very vivid, and I'm always a fan of vivid. "Winter rust colors" reminded me of FarmVille, for some reason.
Same for the first one, above. You have a way with words.


I have what's actually a song, but it could be read as a poem, I suppose. Since it's a song, it pays a little more attention to rhyming, which I wouldn't normally do with a poem, but it's all good. I really like it, 'cause I put a lot of time (a couple years, actually) and feeling into it. A friend of mine also wants to put it to music, so that would be awesome, not to mention a first for any song of mine.
This is one of four songs of mine that I really love because of how much of myself I put into it.


Dark Day - Lonely Night

It's a dark day, it's raining outside
No birds are singing, and at best they cry
Everything's messed up, no one hears me yell
Satan is repenting, this is worse than hell
Nothing is going right, nobody's sane
I can hear no one else, just the rain
This world that I'm dying in is past its time
People hate each other at the drop of a dime
I can hear the rainfall, piercingly soft
In the silence of the chaos, all sense is lost
Within the stained glass of the viper's steeple
Reducing to dust those seduced by evil
Living their lives, they never seek to find
Lessons inside that reside in their minds
Living lies just to die, no reasoning
Enter the cries of the perpetual dream
Let me hear the call from up in the sky
Give me a reason, I wanna know why
At what time did mankind become so blind?
Why is truth, now, so hard to find?
When did we fall so far behind?
How did we end up at the back of the line?
Who made everything that drives this pain?
Find the one responsible and make them pay
Daylight fades away as time rewinds us
Fly me away from those damned who bind us
Nothing gets solved, God's been gone so long
No one has the will to sing a new song
Light is shadowed by the dusk in man
All that's hallowed has been cursed by man
It's a dark day, it's still raining outside
No birds are singing, and at best they cry

It's a lonely night, still raining outside
The dark day is past as I lay here and cry
Maybe someday I'll be able to say
That everything will finally be okay
But, as I lay here in the deep of the dark
I can't change anything, don't know where to start
Every time I look out my window, I try
To see some good in the world, but it hides
Watching as the night falls, callously calm
By the shadows in the darkness, I write this song
Written in the blood of prolonged misery
Hoping maybe someday someone somewhere might see
Living our lives, we never try to find
The desire deep inside that it might end alright
My mind sighs aloud, so deafening
If only I could leave this nightmare for a dream
Let me be one of the blessed who die
Give me a reason, I have gotta know why
What causes a student to butcher his school?
What causes a grown man to think it's so cool
To lie and to steal and to kill people cold?
To be so inhuman? to be so cruel?
Teenagers beat the elderly and get it on tape
A son is forced to watch while his mother is raped
Crosses are burned on black resident lawns
Dads molest their own daughters, and the list goes on
How can we alleviate
All the pain? all the hate?
Things need to be seen through a child's eyes
The child who cries here, so young yet so wise
In this lonely night, the rain subsides
A new day dawns, but the child, so lonely, dies

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

I don't recall her name
I couldn't hold it in my heart
my memory
But she was there that night
or maybe it was a dream
true love with a feeling
dark and mysterious
as her raven's hair lay lightly on my chest
we shared a thought

we shared a night
lit only by one single candle
the candle I still hold close to me
on those lonely nights
when the wind screams
and sighs
but never whispers her name
But still she's there
haunting me
a part of my heart forever
a wasted dream
a wasted thought
as the flame dies out
lost but still here
by my side
in the dark

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

Rage burns in my mind.
Fury grows in my heart.
The sigh of you makes my whole day turn bad.
When I hear your voice, I want to rip your voice box out and stomp it into the ground.
When you look at me, I want to gouge your eyes out.
You bring my anger to extreme levels.
I never hated someone so much or ever thought I could.
The thought of how much I hate you makes me tremble at my own fear.
You think this is something, you haven't seen anything yet.

Re: Poetic Corner (for the Artist in us)

This is how my mind usually works...


Lamb of Mary (you know, the one from Baahh-thlehem big_smile)

Mary had a little lamb, his fleece was white as snow
And everywhere that Mary went, the lamb was sure to go
He followed her to school one day, and so the story goes
That lambs aren’t supposed to be at school
The teacher took Mary out of the class and said
'Now, if he comes here one more time, that lamb will end up dead'
And Mary ran home crying and laid up in her bed
Until she heard her dad call out from the shed
The lamb had ate his coveralls and now was sound asleep
On some hay in the corner where the carrots used to be
And all that was left of a bumper crop of beats
Was a purple stain by the lamb’s feet
Mary took the lamb out to the backyard
And, tied him on a short rope so he could not get far
But, later that day, she found the rope parted
And the lamb hiding underneath the car
She ran off to her mother and asked, 'What can I do?'
She answered, 'Maybe you can find someone to sell him to
I’m sure that you could make a buck, or maybe even two
If you dressed him in a suit and fancy shoes'
She tried and she tried to find someone to take him in
But, no one wanted him, and her will was wearing thin
Until later that week when she asked, 'What’s for dinner?'
And her dad said with a grin, 'Lamb chops'