Topic: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

This is something that was just emailed into me that I KNOW Twilight Fans and non twilight fans can enjoy. Kevin Smiths eloquent, funny as hell and entertaining rant on Twilight Fans. Its some funny stuff that contains lots of colorful and inappropri...

Read More : Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

Oh Patron Saint of Theatre Employees please watch over the poor ushers who have to theater check during the scene when the fellow who got lost on his way to the set of the MTV remake of "Easy Rider" takes off his shirt.  Please protect their ears from bursting out from the cacophony of screaming that will ensue. 

All seriousness, I dropped by my theater the day after I got home (which was the day after Twilight had opened) and I was standing the lobby talking to a friend when I heard what sounded like a whale giving birth.  He sighed and said "Pattinson just walked on screen."  We could hear girls scream even in the lobby....oh Lord...


But, PRAISE SILENT BOB!  Whenever he speaks, it's something important and philosophical.  His last line (won't spoil) had me laughing for so long.

Last edited by thegoldensimatar (2009-07-26 19:59:08)

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

thegoldensimatar wrote:

His last line (won't spoil) had me laughing for so long.

lol:lol::lol:

Seriously, though, the whole Twilight thing is Titanic minus the ship, plus sparkles.

Last edited by FuglyStick (2009-07-26 20:09:17)

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

OMG! That end was freaking funny as hell! ROFL!!! Kevin Smith is a genius at humor....My god that was funny! I guess I won't rip of Twilight any more, im lookin forward to those 18 year old girls lol lol

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

Kevin Smith is amazing!!!!!!

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

FuglyStick wrote:
thegoldensimatar wrote:

His last line (won't spoil) had me laughing for so long.

lol:lol::lol:

Seriously, though, the whole Twilight thing is Titanic minus the ship, plus sparkles.

If you are a girl, I love you, though less than Vamp Wife. [edit- and Mavie, BTK, puppy, & 'Zilla]  If you are a guy, the keg is on me. 
lol

(I didn't have to make the sparkle joke this time, I didn't have to make the sparkle joke this time!  Sometimes it is hard to be the arbiter of 'less sparkles in the world makes us all better')

Last edited by azathoth (2009-07-27 00:53:15)

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

I will help drink that keg!

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

Why do I get the feeling you will steal the keg, drink it, fill it with pee, and return it with 3 minutes?  tongue

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

I wouldn't do that, man.....I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a guy who believes in sharing, BUT when WE finish drinking it, we'll fill it with pee (we'll be drunk enough off the keg to have lots of pee) and give it to someone we don't like!

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

That works for me!  lol

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

You can tell the director knows his audience, i cant imagine that scene would have become such a tween sensation if the dude had produced a snotty rag from his pocket to steam the torrent of blood lol lol

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

I've always had the greatest respect for Kevin Smith because he's so fucking real.  He had it totally sussed.  He's no hater, and he spoke the truth.  Love it.  Big respect to the man.

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

Good on K Smith.  Got to give him mucho respect for telling it like it is.  Now I will also pop a beer and add to my own liqour store below the chest.

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

lol, i would to see his take on the twilight movies.

Re: Kevin Smiths Take On TWILIGHT

Rottenvomit wrote:

lol, i would to see his take on the twilight movies.

First the vampires would smoke some weed, harrass some random people, walk into the sunlight and explode.  People would point and laugh.  Maybe the werewolves would go through a car wash.  Toss up on that one.