A poem for Wolfie:
'Twas a night of a starless sky
When upon my cursed eye
Fell a sight that rightly set my flesh to shiver
For 'pon a foggy English moore
I had knocked upon the door
Of a castle I had seen sat there forever
When the front door had been open
I was greeted by the token
Of a stately and a regal British gent
He first quenched my thirst with tea
A heady brew, he would agree
And then off into the night my host had went
A moment later, and not more
I then heard the mighty roar
Of a creature of whose nature I knew not
But when I looked outside to see
What nightly beast that it could be
My vision fell upon a monster on the lot
It was massive, feral, hungry
Its features animal and sundry
But what struck me 'bout the creature most of all
Was its tiny little weinie
Two or three inches, and I mean teenie
And sadder still it only had one hairless ball
As it feasted on a pound
of rabbit flesh that it had found
It paused and stared as though a thought had crossed its mind
But it was no random thought
The beast had felt, I kid you not
But a mighty crap which launched from its behind
And as I watched with rising fear
As fecal matter escaped its rear
I experienced a daunting realization:
When your body's covered in fur
Including your rectum, you will concur
You get dingleberries the size of a small nation.
Et fini.