The Birds They Are Always Singing (A Short Story)

I knew what i was going to do,i'd made my mind up.I'd had enough, enough of everything. I was a worthless piece of shit, no good to anybody. Everything i did failed. i eithier ended up hurting somebody i cared about or lost them things they couldn't afford to lose. The way people looked at me,i knew what they were thinking"Why don't you drop dead and do us all a favour"?If they saw me approaching  i could see what they were thinking " Oh look out here comes that fucking loser,what's he going to balls up now"? Even family thought i was a joke, and the wife i couldn't do anything right, she said as much many times. No more i'd had it!

I reached the woods the cheery sound of the birds singing their song without a care in the world as the sun started to set at the end of the day.I chose this part of the woods because people seldom came along this way. i often walked here to get away from the hustle and bustle of life and to work off my anger at myself and the world. i would become irritated at the happy sound of the birds always singing , carrying on their  way of life, carefree. I was far enough in the wood to not be easily seen.I stopped and put down the bag i was carrying. I took out the rope and climbed the tree and tied it to the thickest branch i could find, made sure it was good and tight , looped the end of the rope and put it over my head and tightened it around my neck.I took a last look around and the birds were still singing.  I wet my lips and jumped, i had done something right for a change the rope held, everything went black.
I was floating, i seemed to be in a whirl, could almost touch the top of the trees. I looked down and saw myself dangling on the rope lifeless, everything was quiet.I was just hanging in the air, i couldn't as yet move around.There was no noise,no sense of time, but i saw the night, turn to dawn and then the birds started their incessant singing and it was louder than usual. The sun seemed to shine all the time and i knew it was getting warm because i could see the heat haze. Then i noticed the flies landing on my limp body, everytime i looked there seemed to be more. The birds kept on and on, no let up, all the time. I saw the day change to night many times, each day was hot and sunnier than the one before. I was starting to be able to float around a little but  i could not go far from my body.The maggots were crawling over my body now, the birds were helping themselves to the feast of wiggly creatures and then going back to that screeching trill in the trees.Two more days turned to night and i was thinking " Is this it"?"am i stuck here for eternity, a punishment for taking my own life"?As dawn broke the birds started singing again and i saw my body move and i glanced at my face, the eyes were set back in the head and the mouth was a macabre rictus grin  as if to say "It's funny and the jokes on you, you'll never find peace, you are in your own hell, the fate of sinners who take their own life".
Then one day was turning to night when a dog came trundling along and sat and looked at the hanging corpse. A woman was walking, she let out a scream and got out a mobile phone, i had been found. The time after was a blur of activity, the police,my body taken away.I found myself  following it everywhere like a cord between us, lying in the morgue, the autopsy, the funeral and the cremation.
Now i hover around in the grounds of the crematorium, i can move around the whole place, but i always end up at where my ashes were scattered.Everyday in the nearby woods, the birds sing their tireless and constant song.

Last edited by wolfman1959 (2011-06-24 16:30:50)