Topic: Terrifying Encounter
Me and some friends were having a barbecue. We decided to have it on my porch since it's pretty big. Now! As I came out with the plastic plates and some spices and sat them down on the table, I turned in the spirit of cooperation and world peace to fetch the cups as well. Here the sunny cheerful day decided to go and have a drink.
Right in from of me hovers the biggest fucking wasp I have ever seen. No it was not a wasp. It was a matchbox with wings. To the embarrassment of the masculine gender I screamed out in a high pitched voice, stumble backwards in to the grill that faith according to the general rules of comedy had seen to fit place.
Now I guess the timing was a good thing, because the grill was still soaking up spark liquid and was therefore not on fire unlike my primordial terror which was now in the driving seat and was having a blast. To the general amusement of the universe, me, the grill and the coal was suddenly on the porch floor.
At this juncture my brain was generally made up of fear who had manage to make it's self heard above my pride who was making feeble protest. My embarrasment was calmly sitting in a corner taking notes with a smug smile.
Now they say the development of the temporal lobes is one of evolutions gtreatest triumphs. Intelligence, reason, advanced problem solving capabilities and so on. BIG DEAL.
There was noting reasonable or intelligent about my reaction which was purely guided by the same stuff that compelled our hairy ancestors to look for a tree when a growl was heard in the bushes. I just know I'm going to be the laughing stock of all my friends for a long time. But to my defence! A wasp of that size have no business occupying the same planet I happen to inhabit. Just saying.
You got any soul ripping encounters with these hell spawns or other bugs to share?