2010 Horror Movie Preview

The end of 2009 is right around the corner and if you’re anything like me, the promise of a fresh start in a new and badass sounding year is nothing but a pleasure to take in.  Then again if you were anything like me, you probably need to cut back on the drinking a little bit there buddy.  Anyways it looks like you already have a problem (hopefully not a drinking problem). 

You have no idea what 2010 holds for you insofar as horror movies are concerned.  Well I took my time and hard earned money and bribed a few people to bring to you some information about the hottest upcoming horror films for 2010.  I probably didn’t have to bribe anyone now that I think of it.  I could have just used the internet for all of the references.  I know it does porn, but it has like info about horror movies on it right?  Wait… oh yeah….

So here’s some films to look forward to in the "big ole 10ies" (DO YOU GET IT!!!! ROFL!!!!) all synopsizes (synopi? synopsis's?) are from imdb.com

Daybreakers - Dirs: Michael and Peter Spierig (January 8th) Cast: Ethan Hawke, Willem Dafoe, Sam Neill, Isabel Lucas

Synopsis: In the year 2019, a plague has transformed most every human into vampires. Faced with a dwindling blood supply, the fractured dominant race plots their survival; meanwhile, a researcher works with a covert band of vamps on a way to save humankind.

My take:  I’m looking forward to this one.  I love almost everything Ethan Hawke has ever done, and adding a little bit of Sam Neill as a diabolical vampire is all the icing on the cake I need.  Plus will all this Twilight noise going around, it’s nice to be reminded that Vampires should always be kicking ass and looking really hot.

The Book of Eli – Dirs: Hughes Bros (January 15th) Cast: Denzel Washington, Mila Kunis, Gary Oldman

Synopsis: A post-apocalyptic tale, in which a lone man fights his way across America in order to protect a sacred book that holds the secrets to saving humankind.

My Take:  Honestly, who doesn’t like a good post apocalyptic tale that ends with everyone realizing that basically all of the people in the world are extremely evil and cruel but yet hope is still out there.  This feels like a movie that has been done at least 100 times already so I’m not too pumped for this one.  Oh wait, forgot that Mila Kunis is in it...  I’ll be there.

Legion – Dir: Scott Stewart (January 22nd) Cast:  Paul Bettany, Dennis Quaid, Doug Jones, Kate Walsh

Synopsis: After a terrifying biblical apocalypse descends upon the world, a group of strangers stranded in a remote truck stop diner in the Southwest unwittingly become humanity's last line of defense when they discover the diner's young waitress is pregnant with the messiah.

My Take:  The trailer makes this film look a lot like Night of the Living Dead but with Angels instead of Zombies.  I very much look forward to it.  And if you’re keeping score at home, that’s three movies in a row that deal with the extinction of humanity.  That’s depressing, but still pretty awesome.

The Wolf Man – Dir: Joe Johnston (February 12th) Cast: Emily Blunt, Anthony Hopkins, Hugo Weaving, Benicio Del Toro

Synopsis:  Upon his return to his ancestral homeland, an American man (Del Toro) is bitten, and subsequently cursed by, a werewolf.

My take:  Universal has had the Wolfman in its stable since the early days of the studio’s existence so it was only a matter of time till someone updated the story and gave us a polished star driven film.  Every indication points to this being one of the better horror films of the year, but I won’t get too excited just yet.  I’ve been hurt before… Looking at you Van Helsing…

Shutter Island – Dir: Martin Scorsese (July 15th) Cast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Mark Ruffalo, Ben Kingsley, Emily Mortimer, Jackie Earle Haley… and it goes on….

Synopsis: Drama is set in 1954, U.S. Marshal Teddy Daniels is investigating the disappearance of a murderess who escaped from a hospital for the criminally insane and is presumed to be hiding on the remote Shutter Island

My Take:  I was seriously bummed and frightened when this movie got pushed back from it’s original October 2009 release date, but apparently I have nothing to fear.  Early reviews are coming back solid- and… Oh c’mon people! IT’S MARTIN SCORSESE!!!!  I literally can't wait for this one.

The Crazies – Dir: Breck Eisner (February 26th) Cast: Timothy Olyphant, Radha Mitchell, etc

Synopsis: About the inhabitants of a small Iowa town suddenly plagued by insanity and then death after a mysterious toxin contaminates their water supply

My Take:  I’m a huge fan of the original, but when I heard that a remake was in production, my first thought was “that makes sense”.  While Romero’s original was a very good movie, I feel as though it was a large scale film that was shot on too tight of a budget.  It felt like it was getting shortchanged the entire time.  Then again, maybe that’s what made it so claustrophobic and terrifying.  Put this movie under my “intrigued, but not sold yet” pile

Alice in Wonderland - Dir: Tim Burton (March 5th) Cast: Mia Wasikowska, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Crispin Glover, Anne Hathaway… and a lot of other big names.

Synopsis: 19-year-old Alice returns to the magical world from her childhood adventure, where she reunites with her old friends and learns of her true destiny: to end the Red Queen's reign of terror.

My Take: Tim Burton, who apparently needed to come up with material that was destined to be barfed onto T-shirts and dickies messenger bags while being hocked at Hot Topic stores all over the country, brings us a beautiful looking sequel of sorts to the classic Alice in Wonderland Story.  If you are sick of Tim Burton bringing us the exact same visual style movie after movie, then you probably should go see something else this day.  If you love his filthy Victorian verite, then you probably already bought tickets for this one.

Season of the Witch – Dir: Dominic Sena (March 19th) Cast: Nicolas Cage, Ron Perlman

Synopsis:  14th-century knights transport a suspected witch to a monastery, where monks deduce her powers could be the source of the Black Plague.

My Take: From the man who brought us Swordfish comes a story about 14th century knights and a witch that may be the source of the black plague (I bet she is, winkity wink).  I don’t know how they did it, but this is a perfect mix of every topic that could be covered that I am in no way interested in occupying the same movie.  Even if all signs point to it, there is a chance that this may not be terrible.  I kind of want to see what happens.

Repo Men – Dir: Miguel Sapochnik (April 2nd) Cast:  Jude Law, Live Schreiber, Forest Whitaker

Synopsis: Set in the near future when artificial organs can be bought on credit, it revolves around a man who struggles to make the payments on a heart he has purchased. He must therefore go on the run before said ticker is repossessed.

My Take:  I have never seen this movie before, but REPO: The Genetic Opera was way better.  And it totally called firsties.  Also if you go to your local family run video store and mistake this movie for Repo Man, it would be the best thing that ever happened to you.

Piranha 3-D – Dir: Alexandre Aja (April 16th) Cast:  Eli Roth, Christopher Lloyd, Ving Rhames, Elisabeth Shue

Synopsis:  A tremor under the surface of Lake Victoria unleashes scores of prehistoric piranhas, an event which rallies the local sheriff (Shue) who will risk everything to save her townsfolk.

My Take:  I thought that if you wanted to remake a movie, you at least should pick a good movie to remake.  Alexandre Aja is boldly going against that sentiment by remaking a sub-par movie that existed only to make money from Jaws’ success.  Then again if there is any director out there that can make this movie good, it’s going to be Alexandre Aja.  I surprisingly look forward to this movie considering it’s been in production for what feels like 87 years.

A Nightmare on Elm Street – Dir: Samuel Bayer (April 30th) Cast:  Jackie Earle Haley, Thomas Dekker, Rooney Mara, and a whole lot of young people you don’t know

Synopsis: A re-imagining of the horror icon Freddy Krueger, a serial-killer who wields a glove with four blades embedded in the fingers and kills people in their dreams, resulting in their real death in reality.

My Take: I really, really, really don’t want this movie to suck.  Haley being cast as Freddy was completely spot on, which I’m pretty sure was a plot to get me (personally of course, but that’s probable more from my paranoia brought on by the brain medicine) really excited about it.  I want this to be a good movie, but after the 2009 Friday the 13th broke my heart, I don’t think I could recover from the pain if this movie is anything less than fantastic.

Saw VII – Dir: David Hackl (October 22nd) Cast: Tobin Bell, Tanedra Howard

Synopsis:  Detective Hoffman is the last man standing, Jigsaws work is now complete. That is until an old Detective returns to the case and closes in on Jigsaws accomplice. However one last game is already in motion and will truly reveal the fate of John Kramer's master plan.

My Take: Over the years, many of you have grown a lot of disdain over the Saw films, but I myself are not one of them.  I love all of the Saw movies and I truly feel that the quality inherent in the longevity of the series is at least on par with some of the best horror franchises ever.  There, I said it.  I can’t wait to continue my annual October tradition with the next Saw film.

The Descent Part II – Dir: Jon Harris (Springish? 2010) Cast:  Shauna Macdonald, Joshua Dallas, Doug Ballard

Synopsis:  Unable to plausibly explain to the authorities what happened - or why she's covered in her friends' blood - Sarah is forced back to the subterranean depths to help locate her five missing companions. As the rescue party drives deeper into uncharted caverns, nightmarish visions of the recent past begin to haunt Sarah and she starts to realize the full horror and futility of the mission.

My Take:  The Descent was one of the best horror films to come out in the last decade, so it’s no surprise that we have a sequel on our hands.  From everything I’ve read and researched about it, I say with a heavy heart that this movie looks like it will be exactly the same as the first one.  I really hope I have to eat those words.

Let Me in – Matt Reeves (2010) Cast: Chloe Moretz, Elias Koteas, Richard Jenkins, Kodi Smit-MPhee

Synopsis:  A bullied young boy befriends a young female vampire who lives in secrecy with her guardian.

My Take:  This is the American Language remake to one of the top five horror films of the last decade.  I hope this one ends up more like Funny Games than… you know… any Asian horror film remake ever.  High hopes for this one.

Case 39 – Dir: Christian Alvart (January 1st) Cast:  Renee Zellweger, Ian McShane, Callum Keith Rennie, Bradley Cooper

Synopsis: A social worker (Zellweger) fights to save a girl from her abusive parents, only to discover that the situation is more dangerous than she ever expected.

My Take:  Until I was researching this article, I had no idea this movie even existed.  Turns out it was delayed a bunch of times while still having some big star power behind Zellweger and now, Bradley Cooper.  This doesn’t bode well for the film itself, but still I will check it out even if it seems like a dolled up Omen redux.

Survival of the Dead – George A. Romero (Spring 2010) Cast:  Alan Van Sprang, Kenneth Welsh

Synopsis:  On an island off the coast of North America, local residents simultaneously fight a zombie epidemic while hoping for a cure to return their un-dead relatives back to their human state.

My Take:  Magnet just announced back on the 18th that this will be distributed via their OnDemand program before its theatrical release.  All I can say about this film is that it’s about time.  Also, it’s a shame that one of the people who helped create what is now modern horror has to squeeze out distro deals.  The movie looks great, and since it’s done by the same man who did Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, and Day of the Dead, I will be there for the midnight show.

Friday the 13th Part II (August 13th) Cast:  All rumors, no confirmations

Synopsis:  None:  Still writing the script

My Take:  So as far as I could see, they have no definite cast, no director, and no finished script and the movie is supposed to come out in 8 months?  Really?  I’m sure rushing out a sequel can only improve the quality of the film.  The fans deserve a much better effort than what this is shaping up to be.

Well that’s all I got right now.  I’m sure there will be a number of other horror films that come in under the radar and surprise everyone, but right now it looks like we will be looking at a very heavily run studio year.  That could be really bad, or really awesome.  Only time will tell!