5 Horror Villains That Got Theirs

Warning this editorial contains spoilers! Call it old fashioned retribution, but ever since the days of the bible, the common public loves a good story of a villain getting their just desserts.  There are very few moments more satisfying that seeing the main bad guy fall from their reigning perch of terror all the way down to the bottomless pit of hell.  I’m kind of making abroad generalization here, but a lot of us horror fans love to see the bad guy gets what’s coming to him, whenever we aren’t cheering for them (We’re a … different bunch).  For this reason, I’m not counting any kind of serials murderers (i.e serial movie installments) that we all love and root for to see them destroy a group of annoying and one dimensional teens that also had it coming for being so young and good looking (bastards).  So without further adieu, I present to you, the wonderfully beautiful and always charismatic reader, 5 Villains that emphatically got theirs.

Razor Charlie - From Dusk Till Dawn (1997): I really hate exclusive clubs.  It doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that none of them will let me in anymore because of my tendency to remove my pants after only the slightest smell of alcohol (So what, it happened like 12 times or whatever, I’m not Superman).  When the Geckos and their hostages come into the Titty Twister, they are immediately denied service from the bartender Razor Charlie because he feels that they aren’t truckers and thusly not allowed to patronize this fine establishment.  Not only that, but he takes their drink order, then downs it himself right in front of them before telling them to get out of the bar.  Admittedly, the fact that he is also a vampire is pretty bad ass, but I still love seeing this biker class elitist take a pool cue to the chest from a guy with a penis gun who is referred to as “Sex Machine”.

Frank – Hellraiser (1987) So our buddy Frank here is looking for the most intense ride available to him (that apparently isn’t shrooms/pcp/adderall mix that I can “The big Sees-EE), so why not chance the idea that a little puzzle box can open the gates of hell into a tormented limbo worse than anything else in the world?  If your response to that question was “That sounds awesome”, go get yourself some serious psychiatric help.  Not only that, but when Frank comes back to life and for some reason needs to eat people to gain his strength, he starts boning his brother’s girl and manipulating her to lure people back to the attic for him to eat/absorb/kill or whatever the hell he does.  That is like the biggest dick move in the book.  Plus, there would be around 8 people that would probably go on to live happy and healthy lives if only Frank wasn’t so selfish.  This is why it’s so satisfying to see Frank get yanked right back down to hell by Pinhead and his buddies.

Captain Rhodes – Day of the Dead (1985) So what’s worse than being one of only a handful of people during a zombie invasion stuck in an underground bunker?  Well that would be having Captain Rhodes as the highest ranking person in a admittedly loose military situation.  Captain Rhodes runs the place like a High School bully with a vendetta against everyone in the group that isn’t like him.  Even better than that is the unwillingness to listen to reason from any person around him and you’ve got a person who is dooming your entire organization.  He goes on to shoot living (not zombified) people in the head in the middle of a zombie outbreak as well as leaving a small group of survivors to fend for themselves in the zombie caves.  When Rhodes gets shot by a smart zombie and ripped apart by a group of others, there is order to the world once again, but just for a moment.

Krug – The Last House on the Left (1972) You could easily put every one of the antagonists from The Last House on the Left in here, but the deal breaker was of course how they were dispatched and Krug got the most satisfying death of the entire movie.  Krug and his buddies Sadie and Fred kidnap two young girls, rape and murder them, then stay for a night in one of the murdered girl’s parents homes seeking refuge from their broken down vehicle.  We the viewers are the only one who know at first, but it soon becomes clear to the parents and all hell breaks loose.  Krug gets his just desserts for rape and murder when the father of one of the girls that he has killed take him out the good old fashioned American way… chainsaw justice.

Franklin - The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974) Ok, yes I know, Franklin isn’t a villain at all; in fact he is a victim in this fine film.  On top of that, he is a handicap and bound to a wheel chair and I can already hear you asking “but Poppascotch, you handsome devil you, how can you pick a man who is in a wheelchair and who gets violently chainsawed (yeah, I’m making that a verb) and falls down a hill on your list of people who got why they deserved?”  Well, when was the last time that you saw Texas Chainsaw Massacre?  Franklin is not only the most annoying part of the movie he is one of the most annoying characters in all of cinema.  From his constant exasperated farting noise, to his tendency to tell inappropriate stories in front of mixed company, all the way to being an obvious third wheel on a sexy Texas vacation, you can’t help but be extremely happy when he finally gets his.  I know that I was happy to see him go.

Please don’t misunderstand me here, I’m not in any way trying to knock the actors of films down a peg and in fact, I feel that I’m doing the exact opposite.  It takes skill as an actor to perfectly embody the spirit of evil (or pure annoyance) in a film and to know that every day you live the rest of your life, someone is going to see you as a huge asshole just because of some random role you played in a horror movie.  It takes courage to play these characters, and there are five actors who deserved their entire paycheck.  Kudos to all of them.