Vampires Suck Trailer


I'm no fan of Twilight (despite the fact when I get a chance to write something it usually ends up being Twilight news) but honestly I wouldn't have much issue with the series if there wasn't for some storytelling issues and some general head scratching that pervades the whole series.

But blast it all if I'm not gonna run out and read all four books, buy the special collectors DVDs of the first two films, walk around in sparkly body-glitter and go out in public decked out in Team Jacob and Team Edward clothing before I willing see one second of Vampires Suck.  The trailer nearly made me blow my sloppy joe. 

Vampires Suck the new 'spoof' from Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the duo behind Date Movie, Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans, and Disaster Movie.  I felt wretched just writing the word 'spoof' a sentence before as pointing out obvious pop (and in the Movie series, lame) culture references doesn't count as spoofing.  It's insulting audience intelligence.  Smart spoofs/farces take the situations seriously and the absurdity, while absurd is treated as normal and integrated into the plot; Young Frankenstein, 'Allo 'Allo, and of course Blazing Saddles are excellent examples. 

Judging by the trailer, it'll be some mish-mash of the first two films and probably whatever was shown in the trailer from number three for good measure.  And my prediction came true, back in May I wrote: ...werewolves will turn either into puppies... and I think I should take credit/uncredit for more or less what happens to the wolves in this film.  The trailer offers evidence that my other prediction: the vampires will glow like glo-sticks or they'll sparkle so much it'll be blinding...has been proven...somewhat right.

Much like their last film Disaster Movie this is the result of barely six months of production.  Word first broke that this movie was going into production in May and is due out this August.  Yeah, that's fast I think even by Roger Corman standards.  I consider myself a BadMovieMasochist...but there's even some stuff I won't go near.  And come August 18, short of being rigged to the rack; I'm staying away from this.

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