Raiders of the Living Dead Movie Review
In an abandoned prison, a doctor has revived executed convicts as the living dead. Teenager Scott Schwartz (A Christmas Story) creates a weapon from a videodisc player's laser and pursues the walking dead, aided by his girlfriend and grandfather (western star Bob Allen). A reporter (Robert Deveau) on the trail of the story is helped by the town librarian, played in her final film role by Zita Johann (Boris Karloff's "The Mummy," "The Sin of Nora Moran").
On the prison island, the zombies attack a security guard and tear him apart as the reporter and teenager venture into the prison caverns for a final showdown.
Its a good thing I just explained the movie to you. The actors in this movie were apparently terrified of cameras since everytime it was on them they clammed up like MacReady when we whip down his pants in the mall. This movie has the record for the least amount of dialogue. Why talk when you can just do things? In the first 5minutes you get to see a tanker hijacking, a truck breakdown, a highspeed chase, and a power plant hostage taking. The best part is with 0 dialogue you can just add your own. Myself I hope that we can get a dubbed version in Japanese, I would love to have their take on it.
The kid who makes the "Death Ray", ( or the "Zapper1000" as I called it since it didnt kill anyone so the kid calling it a death ray was a bit much ) was hilarious. Remember folks if you want to make a laser beam deathray then you need an old rca tape deck player, some duct tape, some plyers and wire cutters. Just start cutting wires, and spend at least 10minutes taping it and cut to this awesome death ray. Good stuff. Seriously I was hoping it would at least be funny with a little kid having a death ray, it wasnt.
You had to literally read the box to figure out who the characters were and what their names were. You had to piece things together as you went and scratch your head alot. For example about 25minutes in the main character is hit by a car being driven by a woman who doesnt want to pick him up as hes hitch-hiking. She swerves and hits him. Classic. Then she stops 10feet up the road, gets out, and loads him into her car and they cut to him having breakfast in her house. Did I mention not 1 word is mentioned throughout all of this? The only dialogue is him offering to wash the dishes. Allllllrighty then.
Why this movie was named Raiders of the Living Dead is sure beyond me. Any yes I did check the packaging at least 4 times to see if Uwe Boll directed it. This movie granted was an indie film and shot on a low budget, but it really was one of the worst zombie movies I have ever seen. At this point are you wondering why I really have not mentioned the zombies? Well thats because their were not really any zombies in it. Their was a smattering in the end and 3 or 4 throughout the movie itself. I was distracted by some shiney metal on the coffee table so I may have missed some zombies, but im pretty sure 4 is a safe number.
With that said the zombies I did see were pretty well done FX wise. I did not like how death ray or bow and arrow or kung fu chop took them out, but hey the one good thing was the great fx on the zombies. Overall I give this movie a 3/10. The reason is the acting, their wasnt any. I dont think their was more then 200words in the entire film. I cant really say since I cant count past 5 though. The story was confusing, but it was sorta like a "choose your own adventure" book. With next to no dialogue you could just do like I did and talk aloud and play each role.
So if your a die hard zombie fan you wont like this movie. If you like movies wtih a good script you wont like this movie. If you like cancer you will probably like this movie. I paid $40.00 for this movie and i feel this review is my only outlet. Bitter? Yes.