The Thing (Collector's Edition) Review
Written by: prddad
As I hear things on the internet, I’ve decided to go back to the original movies before remakes or sequels come out. It’s all for sh*ts and giggles anyways, right? The sequels/remakes. Hollywood seeing what the market is for a remake/sequel, and if good, they’ll make more. TEXAS CHAINSAW got the remake and prequel. Sorry folks, but to me, both sucked. I waited till one of my drunk friends picked it up for $3.99 at a Blockbuster sale before I watched either…and still regret it. Email me later with your complaints…So, anyways, a ways back there was talk of a direct-to-SCIFI channel version of THE THING. Well, it never came to pass. But with all things old becoming new again, I figured I’d give my 2-cents on this one, for those who are reading. If you are newby to this website, and reading this yet never watched it, turn off the internet, go watch it, then come back and tell me if I was right…
Plot…millions of years ago, a spaceship crashed in the Antarctic, buried below the ice. Fast forward to present day (in the movie it’s the early 80’s) and some Norweign scientists decide to thaw out the remains of, yep, you guessed it, the spaceship. Able to take over any host, the creature slowly starts turning the survivors of the American group into “Things”. leaving the survivors running for their lives as they try to destroy the “Thing”, before they become one of them. But can they trust all those who are left?...Ok, now that I’m done sounding like a narrator, I did it this time (those that read my reviews know I don’t do that) because for those that are new to the genre, or to horror movies, this movie itself will sound like any piece-of-crap sitting in the horror section of any movie rental chain out there. This one differs because it came first. Well, not really, but the idea w/the gore came first. There is really no CGI, it’s all real special effects. And when I mean real, I mean animatronics, rubber and latex, the old fashioned scare tactics, etc. When you watch this movie the first time (or repeated times for us classic hounds), you’ll work your schedule around this. You’ll be washing dishes then when you hear the huskies howl, you know it’s time to go back into the living room with your lasagna and beer, waiting for the massacre to begin. Nowadays, you don’t find those classic moments that you’ll always remember. It’s all cheap scares…
Acting…Most of those in the movie I don’t think I’ve ever seen before, but Kurt Russell has gone on to bigger and better things. When with friends, we tend to call him “John Carpenters’ B*tch!”, only because of the amount of movies he has starred him in. But you can’t blame John, Kurt is an excellent actor. He stole the movie in my book, brinking an unlikeable character to life, and making him determined to live, against all odds…
Nudity…sorry guys, only men at the snow base…
Gore/Scares/CGI…Sorry, I stated all above. It is a freaky movie, it does suck you in and not want to let go (just like that one scene, towards the end, with the paddles and the doc having the “heartattack”…yeah, yeah, you know what I mean. Yet another classic moment…
Bottom line…if you have seen it, good, go watch again. If you haven’t, go. You won’t regret it. If you do, then you need to watch something more along your tastebuds…I think Strawberry Shortcake or Rainbow Brite is on DVD…J