Zombiez Review

Written by: KILLSWITCH   

My name is ryan. i am 14 and would just like to say that in all my years of zombie movie watching this movie has to be the worst one ever made. whatever happened to the creativity of the george.a.romero trilogy or evil dead. those were good scary movies. this is an insult to all zombie movies. we were all seduced into renting it by its cool cover and the z at the end of zombieZ that made it look cool.i could have made a scarier, bloodier, gorier more interesting movie with a shitty video camera and some catchup packets.

The effects in this movie are crap. like when the car crashes into the pole not even a half a second after it almost hits the girl but still manages to be way down the road. also when the nude chic is getting sliced in the head the cleaver leaves no sign of damage to her head. the guts look like packaged chicken breasts that you would by at the grocery store. also when she breaks her ankle and cracks it between the trees how would that help heal it?! i don't even want to comment on the acting. all the while they try to put hip music in the backround witch is the same thing over and over again. it also doesnt help that i love metal and dont like rap.

also where do they get all these cheap plastic butchers knives that in some scenes clearly say made in taiwan. they also tried to bring a new feature of talking zombies to the zombie genre. i say zombies should only grunt and moan, walk slow, devour innocent people and go down with a shot to the head. I kind of like the idea of pairing a zombie with a nice sharp cleaver but they have to look real unlike the ones in this movie that were probably purchased at a dollaramma. and if these zombies are killing everyone and everyone is dead how come they dont kill the girl. why are they loading meatpies into the trunk??! and there is a man in a chicken suit. when they got people to play the zombies they had no makeup, were all black (not to be racist or anything) and could talk perfect english. she fires ten shots with a pistol and doesnt have to reload?!! take away the fact that the people call themselves zombies and you got a gangster shoot up movie.

My God this sucks ASS!!!! whoever directed this move should go door to door and refund the $4.75 it took to rent this peice of crap to everyone who rented it. But all is not lost. mastermind Tobe Hoopers MORTUARY is something to look forward to. i hope undead is way better than this.