The Cottage (2008) Review
Written by: the5thdroog
Movies can be funny sometimes. I mean I knew this was supposed to be a dark comedy, but I had no idea how heavy it was on the dark. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard a movie described that way only to wait and wait for there to be any horror involved. Most of the times they just go for the laughs and even more times it is more of a slapstick effort at that. The Cottage was a movie that should sit in the dictionary right under the listing of dark comedy.
It starts out innocent enough. A couple of brothers show up in a cottage way out in the country. They start discussing things and then one has to go out to the car for supplies. As he opens the trunk you see a girl inside next to the supplies. You wonder if she is just unconscious or dead. We then realize that she is alive and she is part of their scheme to get some money from a rich owner of a strip club that is in town over an hour away. The brothers are constantly bickering about one thing or another. The older brother, David (Andy Serkis), is the brains behind the operation and Peter (Reece Shearsmith) was along for a quick score, but has no nerve for this kind of thing. Along comes the other accomplice, the step brother of the kidnapped girl. He was the one the father used to send the money to the two brothers, but the father, Arnie, knew it was a set up from the beginning. He has someone trail the step-brother to scout the area and see what they are up against.
So far it is just your average run of the mill botched kidnapping comedy and that is fine. After some mishaps with the cell phones David is forced to go to the local village to use the pay phone. He makes the call and is met face to face with “old man” (Doug Bradley). He warns David that the place his is staying isn’t safe. David thinks very little of this. He gets back to the house to find his brother and their hostage both gone and the step-brother knocked out in the floor. She escaped and took Peter as a hostage. Before David can walk out the door in search of them, a bloodied stranger comes falling through the doorway. He warns them not to go out or they will die, just like him. Upon further inspection they see that he has been gutted. So now David has to wonder just what is going on out there and where is his brother in all of this mess.
The acting in this movie was really done well. The two brothers were very believable and their banter kept things light and easy enough to want to pull for them in this chaos. Jennifer Ellison played the hostage and she was really quite funny in the role. Just seeing Doug Bradley, however briefly, added to the quality of the movie. There was nothing to complain about with the acting.
The effects were wonderful. In the first part of the film I was just thinking they were little things here and there, but once things take off, the kill scenes come off very well. There was even a scene that reminded of my favorite (and probably only) Starlog magazine I had. It was the one with all the masks sitting in rows on the cover. Also a very cool scene at the end that you just don’t see enough of. Top notch effects and plenty of blood to go around in this movie.
As I was watching this and I started to feel myself turn into liking it more and more, I couldn’t help kind of consider this being a Shaun of the Dead type movie except instead of zombies we get to have a slasher flick. There is nothing wrong with that. The movie had me laughing one minute and then smiling just at how over the top a kill was the next. If you’re looking for a movie that will entertain you on any or all of these levels you’re in for a treat.