Jason X Review
Written by: Norrock The Zombie Eater
I had forgot all about "Jason X" till the little new comers came about and wrote a review on it. And !!damnit!! Jason X" is one flick i did not want to rember. Now that my brain has been reexposed to this bullshit again im going to do what i do best and fucking bitch about it lol.
Anyone that has heard about "Jason X" they know what kinda shit to expect. Yeah the masked killer Jason Voorhees goes to space. How Fucking gay is that. Who ever fucking wrote the story to this movie was on crack. This movie is a joke. If you have read over my "Seed Of Chucky" review you should rember me saying that "Seed Of Chucky" is a joke but its a good joke as for "Jason X" its a joke also but this one is a fucking bad joke !!realy bad!!.
Ok so now let me fill you in on what i think about the "Friday The 13th" flicks. I've never been a huge fan of em you know how i am about teen horror flicks. But don't let me fool you. Just because im not a fan of "Friday The 13th" don't mean i don't ever watch them. Sure i do you know how i am about good gore and nude chicks and a "Friday The 13th" films serves up a good taste of both. Truth is my fav two out of the long runing Jason Voorhees series would be two of the newer ones "Jason Goes To Hell" and "Freddy Vs Jason". Yeah so i liked the plot change that "Jason Goes To Hell" and "Freddy Vs Jason" had it was something new and kool to watch. "Jason X" has a plot change but it is just so stupid and uncalled for.
Enough with the bitching now on to some other stuff you might want to know about "Jason X". Like how good are the special effects. If i said they sucked i would be lying my ass off. "Jason X" does have a very lame story but at least we get some fun kills to watch. The gore is good in this one. It is now time to kick your dead loving ass into my view of the story.
The year is 2455 and our world as we know it has finely came to an end. Did all human life end with the world you might want to know. Of course not some of us got away in space ships lol. In this story we meet up with a team of scientists. Space must be geting realy boreing to them cause they go back to the wasted world to see what they can find to study on. So you may be willing to ask what do they find. Well they find two frozen human forms one is a chick, the other is Mr Voorhees. This is where the story starts geting realy lame. From the way the ending was in "Jason Goes To Hell" !!how the fuck!! did Voorhees get out of burning hell and end up frozen like some pickled lab rat.
Ok back to the story. The dumb ass scientists are smart enough to take both frozen bodies up in the ship to do research on. They use super duper space technology to bring the lady back to life. The lady must have been one of the last ppl Jason got after, and they both got frozen before he could make his last kill. To make this long story short in a odd way. she wakes up with a fear, and she knows Jason is near. The scientists will laugh and she will cry. But in the end they all will surely die.
over all i give "Jason X" a 3 just for serveing up a nice plate of gore. If your new to horror don't rent "Jason X" unless your just looking a movie to watched where folks in space get killed kool ways. If you like this movie also see "Jason Goes To Hell" and "Freddy Vs Jason".