Killer Pad Review
Written by: ArsonCuff
Killer Pad was directed by Freddy Krueger, I mean Robert Englund, and the screenplay was written by Dan Stoller. The plot involves three guys from Illinois who have traveled to live in the Hollywood Hills in a house that they think is a “killer pad.” Their minds clouded over with all of the future parties and wild sex they’ll be having in their new home the trio sort of overlook the fact that the house is a portal to Hell. Daniel Franzese, Eric Jungmann, and Shane McRae star, with Joey Lawrence making a cameo as himself.
The movie can be summed up as one drawn out series of poo poo and wee wee jokes. I am not saying adult, profane humor, I am saying on the level of actual 8 year olds. Naturally it is rated R since there is some killing and such. The R does not come from the sexual gags because quite frankly it doesn’t even reach the level of softcore in terms of American Pie shock factor or a good ole fashion horror boob-a-thon. I mean three women get into a hot tub and nary a nipple slips out before they are cooked alive.
All of the turd, poop, and weenie jokes are ill timed and the acting in the film is 100% horrible.
The plot ends up being, basically, that these three annoying characters throw a party and the devil starts killing their guests. However, two of the three guys after finding dead bodies decide they do not want to ruin the party and the running gag is them trying to hide all of the bodies without the third guy noticing. At no time throughout did I even crack the tiniest of smiles. My opinion: Killer Pad is a stinker.