Blade: Trinity Review
Written by: 4thHorseman
I didn't think this should be considered a horror movie when i saw it on the list, but then i remember watching it, and realized it is a horror movie. Not in the sense of scary by slashing people up, but scary as in why the hell would the studio released this horrible sequal. That's right folks, like most sequals, this was a shitfest. Let's get this review started:
Now, the effects and everything were pretty cool, i'll give it that. However, those were not enough to save this movie. Basically, it was the same stuff from the first two movies over again. Blade shoots shit that burn them up, sword fights, more tech nonsense, etc etc etc. Just watch the first two movies, and you'll see the same stuff in Blade: Trinity. So same stuff, in a horrible movie.
Jessica Biel and the other guy who's her brother. Now, Biel is a hotty, and i loved her in this movie. Just, it was a blatant way to throw in advertisements (for Ipods) and have songs playing all the time. Honestly, who goes around killing people listening to Mudvayne? stupid concept. The Ryan character was horrible in general. I've never liked the actor, not even in the National Lampoon movie. So he's in this action movie...but of course he can't do anything but crack stupid jokes. So his only role in this movie is to get his ass beat by Triple H (i wont get into what i thought about his acting) and being the comedic relief in the movie.
Then comes Dracula. Dracula is considered the greatest vampire in history, and they built up this movie as Dracula the badass. So of course, im expecitng a huge fight scene at the end where Blade gets his ass romped on, but sadly, none of the above happened. Possiblyt the shortest boss fight scene of the three movies (even the Ryan vs Triple H fight lasted longer) and Dracula turned out to be a pussy 100%. Blade stood a chance against him the entire time, so the entire buildup of the Dracula character turned out to be a joke, because the ending battle made me about cry realizing i spent $6 to watch this movie. In other words, don't expect much, because you will be greatly disappointed.
I don't know what else to add. Easily the worst of hte three movies (and i despised the 2nd one sooooo much), but is it worth having? In my opinion, no. is it worth renting....probably not. Borrow it from someone or wait till it's on tv. I regret ever seeing this movie,as it did nothing for me, or really did anything for the series. This was a horrible movie, and one of the worst comic adaptation (or whatever you wanna consider it) movies i've EVER SEEN. By the time the movie was over, i wish i had a blade through my skull...it was that painful.