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The Loved Ones (2009) Review

Monster Mary 1 Comment Movie Page: The Loved Ones (DVD)
The Loved Ones (2009) Review

Lola, a quiet loner,  works up the courage to ask Brent to the School Dance.  Brent lets her down quickly and politely because he is already planning on going to the Dance with his long time girlfriend, Holly.   Brent is racked with guilt over the accident that caused the death of his Father six months earlier.  He wears a razor blade around his neck and cuts himself on a regular basis to remind him of the pain and guilt that he feels about his Father dying in a car accident while Brent was driving on a country road.

Unfortunately for Brent, Lola doesn’t handle rejection very well.  She is Daddy’s little princess and usually gets anything and everything she wants, and right now she wants Brent.  Lola’s father kidnaps Brent and brings him home for his little princess to do with what she will.  Lola is looking for her Prince Charming among all the frogs in High School and none of them seem to measure up to her Father.  After  Lola decides a boy is not good enough for her, she likes to torture them with knives, power tools, or anything else she might find around the house.

The Loved Ones is a strange mix between an 80s Romantic Teen Comedy and a Torture Porn movie.   This unusual combination makes for an extremely  unique and different kind of  Horror Movie.   It was quite beautiful to look at with pink dresses, glitter, and a disco ball during the Dance scene.   But don’t be fooled into thinking The Loved Ones is all pretty girl stuff though,  there are some real cringe worthy horrific moments to be had as well.  The pretty prom scene is in very sharp contrast to the brutal torture that Brent has to endure from Lola after she has decided she doesn’t want him anymore.

Lola is the type of girl that blends into the background at school.  The quiet girl that sits in the corner or the Teacher’s pet that gets straight A’s.  She hasn’t quite grown up yet and she is looking for her version of the Perfect Prom King.  It’s as if she watched too many Disney movies when she was a little girl and no boy can ever measure up to her high standard.   Lola and her Father have a very unique and close relationship though.

What Lola failed to plan for , was Brent’s addiction to pain.  No matter what she seems to do to him, he has the strength to endure.   If anything it spurns Lola on and makes her even more vindictive and vicious towards Brent.  The moral of the story seems to be don’t ignore the quiet girl in the corner.  It’s always the quiet ones in the end that you have to watch out for.


3.5 / 5 stars     

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1 Comment

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      1. MsGorefiend July 19, 2012 at 8:14 pm

        Great review! God I love this movie. It has its flaws, but for some reason I just can’t help but adore it. The dark humor alone is enough; add the gore, the visuals, the music and I have to admit that I’m hooked. I’ve watched it three times in the last week or so.